Posts Tagged ‘satire’

The U SUCK ASS TV Network (now we know what the USA in the name stands for)…

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Two Chronically Moronic Awards go out to the USA Network in the same week! I know that’s a switch from the norm, but lets talk about why….

Last night was Det Bobby Goren’s (Vincent D’Onofrio) final episode in Law and Order CI… the U SUCK ASS TV Network really let the fans down and dropped the ball in what should have been a farewell to this iconic character of the show.

If you haven’t seen the episodes yet, and do not want the jist of what happened in part 1 and 2, read no more, this contains spoilers….

Loyalty part 1: Written by Walon Green

In Manhattan, Somali-born Hassan (Ato Essandoh) and Kadra absorb the death of their father, as Broidy, Loftin (David Pittu), and Van Dekker (John Sharian) celebrate the completion of a well-executed plan. With the sheikh gone, they are free to proceed with an elaborate arms deal. The deal is partially dependant on establishing a police force within the small African region, under their control. Posing as an international businessman, Loftin meets with Captain Ross, and makes him an offer he can’t refuse. Broidy and his mistress Marya have a final night of celebration before they wind up shot through the head and washing up on the shores of South Street under the Brooklyn Bridge and Governor’s Island.

Goren and Eames discover Broidy was an arms dealer who ran a security company with Van Dekker. They also uncover that he was the target of a federal RICO case. When the detectives take their case to Ross, the captain tells them that FBI is watching Brody and that they should drop it. Intrigued, the detectives dig deeper and become suspicious when they find an email from Broidy to Loftin approving a payout to Ross for $2 million.

Meanwhile, Hassan studies with a Mullah in an effort to quickly brush up on the history of his country and his religion. He faces pressure from his sister, Kadra, to break off his long-term relationship with American-born, Jill Peak (Jicky Schnee).

Goren, concerned about Ross’s possible involvement, pays an unscheduled visit to Loftin, posing as a civilian. Goren narrowly escapes, but he and Eames only become further entangled in their dangerous quest for answers. Soon, the case takes a tragic turn, threatening to forever alter their lives.

Captain Daniel Ross is murdered in the middle of this episode while working undercover with the FBI on their RICO case, and Loftin’s body is found soon afterward. As Goren, Eames, and Nichols start to put more pressure on Van Dekker, the FBI shows up to take him into custody, leaving the detectives empty-handed.

Loyalty part 1 was pretty decent… Captain Daniel Ross (Eric Bogosian) went out in grand style, as a hero and patriot to his country. Bobby was in his typical style of lets get to the bottom of this, screw the FBI… LOYALTY to his Capt and friend.

Lets get to part two….

Loyalty Part 2 Written by Barbara Hall

The sole remaining tie to Ross’s death is Van Dekker, the lone survivor of Hassan’s brutal take-down. The cops want to bring him in for questioning, but he is under the protection of the FBI. Van Dekker is their link to a Somali arms deal. The U.S. government orchestrated the transfer of illegal arms to Hassan, which are covertly equipped with GPS devices. Hassan will likely provide the weapons to terrorist camps throughout Somalia, and the U.S. government will target and destroy the camps. Agent Wendy Stahl has no intention of turning Van Dekker over to the detectives. Goren, aware of the constraints of pursuing Ross’s murder from inside the force, throws a punch at Van Dekker and gets himself suspended from the Major Case Squad. New Major Case detective, Serena Stevens, witnesses the decisive moment.

Van Dekker dutifully reports to Hassan and swears he gave nothing to the FBI. Unwilling to trust anyone, Hassan orders hitman, Tristan, to kill him. Learning that Hassan ordered the murder of his partners, his sister, Kadra, swears that his actions have brought a curse on them. Furious, she pressures Hassan to end his relationship with American-born Jill Peak.

Upon learning of Van Dekker’s death, Agent Stahl suspects Goren of vigilante justice for Ross’s murder. Eames is forced to ask Goren for his alibi; he has none. He tells her he has uncovered a money trail from Loftin to a venture capitalist, Milgram. Goren is convinced he is the money-man behind the arms deal.

Goren shakes down Milgram, a weak-kneed money-man. Milgram tells that the arms are stored at one of his warehouses, which leads Goren to R.J. Patel. When Goren confronts Patel, he is blindfolded and taken hosage. When the blindfold is removed, Goren stares into the face of Agent Stahl. She reluctantly allows Goren to help with their investigation, but warns she can’t protect him or re-instate him on the force.

Detectives Nichols, Eames and Stevens get a search warrant for Hassan’s place. The evidence they uncover there leads them to suspect a planned coup attempt. The Chief of Detectives taps Eames as Captain Ross’s replacement. The caveat is she must fire Goren from the Major Case Squad.

Jill, returning home one evening, is shot and killed. At the crime scene, the detectives realize that this murder differs from the previous murders.

Nichols interrogates Hassan and Kadra. Nichols provides evidence suggesting Hassan ordered the death of their father. The information is powerful enough to turn Kadra against Hassan. She admits to killing Jill in order to remove a threat to Hassan’s rule, but she cannot abide the murder of their parents. She agrees to provide a statement linking Hassan to Ross’s murder, and that of the other men.

Just as Nichols is about to nail Hassan, Goren intervenes. He tells of the FBI’s investigation and the covert weapons deal to wipe out terrorist cells in Somalia. Goren argues that they can best honor Ross’s death by allowing the deal to go through: the deal for which Ross gave his life. It could wind up saving millions of lives. Nichols objects. It means letting Hassan walk away, become a despot, and get away with murder. It’s tough to swallow.

In the final moments of the episode, Eames carries out her duty and fires Goren. Immediately following, she submits her resignation.

You would think that with his final episode, I mean he is a WELL LOVED character of fans of the show; he would have had more then aprox 10 mins of time in the show.

Goren at first seemed NORMAL.. at the end, they didn’t even let him leave the show in “Bobby Goren” style. They turned him into a sheep that finally has been brain washed to follow along with the rest of the flock. OUR Bobby would still have questioned the whys of everything despite his loyalty to Capt Ross. OUR Bobby would typically have been a harder sell.

The ending was very anti climatic…

We had the new Monk, Det Zach Nichols saying witty things like I will see you on TV, after someone does to you what you did to your father, or being hung in a basement like Sadam Hussein… (Ok honestly, that was one of the episode highlights to me.)

Eames as stated above fired Bobby like she was supposed to, then dropped her badge and gun on the desk, made the call that she would not be taking that Capt’s exam after all. The loyalty in these two episodes was to Capt Ross, and even though her loyalty was waivering in part 2, Eames’ loyalty to Bobby. Some could argue that it was loyalty to country as well.

In some senses, the end gave us a ray of hope that he was going to the FBI after being fired from the Police Dept… the ending left it a little open.. but going off the quote from before:

“L&O:CI” is a USA Network show now after running on sister channel NBC. And USA, insiders point out, likes lighter fare when it comes to its shows. Goldblum is more in the tradition of Tony Shalhoub’s “Monk” than D’Onofrio.

I highly doubt it will happen that he will be brought back to the show in an FBI jacket. Even if he does, will he still be the same Bobby Goren, or will he be the newly created lamb following the rest of the flock that Barbara Hall turned him into?

I hope to hear what you all think about the final episode that Eames and Goren were in.

On closing, the goes to two recipients today…

The U Suck Ass TV Network for the way they allowed this iconic team to be kicked out of business, and to writer Barbara Hall for being a lamb and turning Bobby into one.

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Revelations come to me as I am thinking about Law and Order CI and the Monk fetish USA has…

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They show SVU a lot on USA…. is that next to go? ICE-T IS DEFINITELY NOT the Monk type!!

This means war!! *Starts a Save FIN Campaign!*

Ice - T as Det. Odafin "Fin" Tutuola

Ice - T as Det. Odafin "Fin" Tutuola

Ice - T as Det. Odafin "Fin" Tutuola

Popularity: 13% [?]

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